Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time you are near?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.
Why do stars fall down from the sky
Every time you walk by?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.
On the day that you were born
The angels got together
And decided to create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold
And starlight in your eyes of blue.
- The Carpenters
im still pissed. i thought i could push back all the thoughts but nooo, i just couldnt do it. i saw you in school and i felt like slapping you hard. okay, im turning cruel and evil. but i cant do anything now can i ? you totally spoilt your own image i had of you. some kind of caring person huh. take that and that and that and that. -keeps slapping and boxing you.
whats happening now ! i cant take the fact that you tell her. i dont understand why everyone is oblivious to everything thats going on around them ? dont you know that what you're doing is so hurting ? take her for example. it's her last year here. you've two more years in this school and you had to sit right ? you just had to. i mean, how selfish ? the disappointment she had was so obvious. dont tell me none of you saw it. gosh.
and i really cant take the fact that people just dont ever let you forget the past that you're trying so hard to forget. i know that it was her. we've spoken about our primary school days a million and one times already. even tho i've been dying to bring it up, i dont. i know how hurting it is, or how humiliating everything is. but guess you guys dont really know how much one tries to forget such stuff huh. everyone has some past that we try so hard to forget. guess there's no way to ever run away from it. it somehow catches up with you. /:
im getting so pissed & annoyed at every little thing thats happening around.
you not telling me.
you treating me like im dumb & stupid.
you showing your 'care & concern' by writing it down.
you asking 'innocent' questions not knowing how i feel.
you mixing with them.
you coming up with new 'policies'.
you not being bothered.
you always getting away with things.
the list just can go on and on.
ouch, i feel my heart hurting already.
i dont know if im upset, pissed, disappointed or. or. or. or. i really thought you were nice. i really looked up to you. but guess everything was destroyed huh. now who do i look up to ? you changed after you got your position. she says it's fine, you're of a higher authority. but HELLO ? you dont change just cos you've received a higher position. you dont go around bossing people just because you're of a higher position. so scoot and get lost. zhi ren zhi mian bu zhi xin.
you guys are lousy and you guys practice such double standards. so what if she* is one of your members ? that so doesnt give her* the right to break the rules ! so what if he*'s under your watchful eye ? that doesnt give him* the right to do whatever he wants ! that doesnt give you* the right to lie & constantly protect him. heeeellloooo ? so does this prove that everyone can also be so two-faced ? this is what youre teaching us. bleahh. get lost. get lost. i mean it, like nowwww !
mumster ! tell me that this is nothing but a dream. i'll wake up tomorrow and everything will go back to how it all was. oh i forgot, no A1 for chinese i cant go see you huh /: who cares, i still love you moreee <3
let your heart out.
dont try to act like you know me very well. cos i can safely say that you dont.
i know what you think. i've heard it from her. i went through that whole period of getting worked up about it, being bothered about it. i didnt expect you to even mention it.
i tried, did you even see it ? you didnt bother, did you ? i just knew you wouldnt.
of course, there's no one to blame. no one is at fault. but i dont see how it's my fault also. it's my style. you were happy with that thats why you agreed, didnt you ? you knew but now you're making a fuss out of it ? i dont see the logic. dont think you're so smart and excellent cos i can say you're not. you're not even people i look up to. you're not even someone who are excellent role models for me to follow. cos you dont know it, but i've heard how much people hate the way you work. so still think you're that great ? think again.
the question you posted to me. WHY. i've been asking myself this the whole time. i really dont understand WHY. why why why. i guess i just cant come up with any reason for you right now. but the combi was bad. i can really say it's bad.
who was the idiot who came up with this idea in the first place ? you the creator of problems. life is complicating enough. why couldnt you just let us be who we wanted to be ? instead of changing us to become someone we're not ?
damn ! am i pissed.
stop being such 'square' people can you ? you're supposed to learn how to be creative. everyone's emphasizing on the change. and that we should not follow what used to be done. we should change since everything's different. but hey ! this only happens when you want it to change. i dont feel it's fair. the more you say it's different, the more we should get a say in it. isnt it the right way ? you're calling the shots all the time. you're always right. thats bullshit im telling you. can you learn to listen ? maybe others have better ideas. it's so ironic how you keep emphasizing on the change when you keep thinking so 'square-ly' yourself. you're still thinking the old way. so what change are you even talking about ? i wasnt 'bred' in that manner just in case you forgot.
i thought of an example to elaborate but we'll leave this as it is.
plus today, you told me exactly what you wanted. she was there too. we questioned the effiency of it all. you said it'll be fine. when everything went as you said, you told me that we forgot about it. HELLO HELLO HELLO ? -slaps you. NOW DO YOU REMEMBER ? as usual, we're at fault yet again. hooray ?! she wasnt there to verify. i was there alone trying to tell you that i was hundred percent positive. yes, hundred percent. i totally couldnt take the way you kept saying you were right. damn it ! you made the mistake. but it's our fault ? or should i say my fault ? wth. whats this ! of course, since she wasnt there, i was seen as the 'bad guy'. (yet again) this so doesnt make any sense to me at all.
losing your memory ? i think everyone should start walking around with tape recorders. we so need to record every single thing thats said. to think i thought you were nice. oh puhlease. /:
i really need this whole venting session. whats this ! i dont see any logic at all. im pissed at you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you and you. get lost. dont think you're all that great. cos you aint. ugh must you piss me off so so so so much ?
damn you ! im gg to close my eyes and count to three. when i open my eyes, you'd better vanish. one.... two....
im looking at my blog. 'run the redlights'. i wish i could do that. be like peyton, it helps a person relief stress maybe. the problems might just vanish. 'listen to your heart'. im listening to it. it hurts bad. it says cry. it's trying to find a way out too. help. im desperate.
GET LOST & DONT COME BACK.
let your heart out.
i started to smile when i saw philip, gladys & auntie ! ohboy ohboy. haha. the choir was soft, but i could hear grace's voice booming at the background. couldnt help but laugh. heh. met my dear family members after mass. gosh! they so made my day (: guess it really shows how much i miss them.
sahgu's contacts are nice.
the others were commenting how small it makes his eyes look. haha. (sahgu, dont listen to them ! i better taste !) heh. i need to go out with them soon. i miss my mummy, sahgu, zeegu and all the others ! ohman. that stupid sahgu made me so high yesterday.
so glad i got to talk to them ! ohboy ohboy.
but mass that night was eeyer. heh. so many booboos ! haha. it was quite funny though. and of course, mummy found it difficult to explain our relationship so she just went "it's complicating". haha. thats funny (:
guess im just so easily satisfied ! or maybe it's cos i didnt expect you* to do it. but you did(: thankyou for that.
and mass was funny. the priest couldnt stop emphasizing woRLd. the RL is emphasized so badly. haha. and he kept doing the 'T' sound at the back too ! haha. omg, thought of stupid yuenying's laughter and i kept trying to control my laughter.
oh yes. you grew taller ? not sure if thats such a good thing or not. and the fact that you bothered tells a lot ? heh.
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MAMA (:
STAY FUN AND FUNKAYYE.
i so need to get my phone checked. ugh. bluetoothing is a problem right now. school starts tomorrow and i can already feel my world shattering all over again. sahgu ! help me.
cant thank you guys enough.
let your heart out.
overall, i did badly.
i'll never forget victoria. haha. arent you the greatest ? -wink wink. okay, i cant blame her. even though my perfect tradition was broken. i got cai. i dint know if she was stating a fact or asking me a question. but i think it's kinda good that i didnt get her*. it would probably be so embarrassing cos the topic was disgusting. so maybe i do love you vic ! haha. thanks for saving me (:
mother's day was fun. it was the usual family celebrations :D yay ! i absolutely love my relatives. it was thanks to them that the day just went great. watched Deal or No Deal. omg omg omg. what a show ! i cant take it. heh. the suspense etc. omg, all of us just couldnt take it. we were laughing and commenting that we should change the channel. but no one did ! haha. we were just laughing at how ridiculous it all looked. we were all placing bets on whether he'll choose Deal or No Deal. heh (: but duh, it'll be a No Deal ! haha. it's a friggin one hour show !
omg, my pri school tchers and ms ang msged me all of a sudden. i was shocked but of course, it was because of that thing that msfir did. heh. cacat lah (:
got to meet ameerun&deni in a bit. then meet dyanna&cho. heh (:
i love the rain. no one can see those tears falling from my eyes.
let your heart out.
halfway through myes. and msfir left. my, horrible withdrawal symptoms are going to come. eeyer. /:
susan, i want my pizza ! haha. i actually improved okay. thanks to you of course :D must give you credit.
ohboy, i've amath and physics left. oh, ive orals too ! heh. and im glad the content heavy subjects are all OVER. hooray for that.
omg omg, im hooked on Hana Kimi. ahh, haha. wuzun lahhh. so going to start watching it after MYEs. i need my break !
im going to miss that mirror in school. everytime i walk past it, millions of memories are thrown back to me.
it's going to be forever to the next time im online.
to all mummy-s in the world, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY :D
you guys are amazing people.
hey you, your turn will come soon (: next yr you can celebrate mother's day too. remember to invite us, the godsisters yes ? haha. we'll teach him well. -cough. haha. i want to be his fashion stylist. oOoOo. we'll teach him all the cool stuff we know ! he'll be in good hands. omg, hurry ! i absolutely adore babies. thankyou for being part of my life. your baby's gg to be one lucky kid (: love you !
let your heart out.
archivesY
July 2006August 2006September 2006October 2006November 2006December 2006January 2007February 2007March 2007May 2007June 2007July 2007August 2007September 2007October 2007November 2007
linksY
annearetha
carissa
caroline
cassandra
cheney
cherylang
cheryllek
cheryl
chewy
chinyang
christopher
crystal
cyril
erny
fawn
felicia
genevieve
gerald
gisella
grace
januver
jiajia
june
katrina
keshia
kimberly
kleo
leah
lester
marion
melsa
melissa
melvyn
moses
nathalie
nevin
peckyi
priscilla
rachael
sampereira
samtan
sherilyn
shermaine
sheryl
tongahlian
shuhua
stephanie
tessa
trisha
valerie
victoria
wanchun
weizhen
winston
yanling
yingxin
yuenying
creditsY
Designer: xImage: x
Brushes: x x
Font/Wings: x